'He's done a total 180': Bride Calls off Wedding and Breaks up With Fiancé After His Drastic Personality Change During Their Engagement

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jul 26, 2024 6:00 PM EDT

I fully support the idea that people should be 100% themselves when they are around their loved ones. There should be absolutely no reason for couples to feel uncomfortable around each other, or feel like they shouldn't show their true colors to their significant other. When both of the people in a relationship are completely themselves, that allows them to understand just how compatible they truly are with each other. If at that stage, something is still not right between the couple, there is a big chance it will never be.

It is a good thing that the girl in this Reddit story realized her boyfriend was not the right choice for her before their upcoming wedding. After they got engaged, the boyfriend started to show his true colors, and they were not the colors OP (original poster) expected to see. Now, after trying to plan a wedding together, OP understands that she should not marry this man, and decides to call off the wedding.

Scroll down to read the full story. Up next, click here for a story of a feud between parents over their kids' clothes.

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  • 01
    Getting engaged has ruined my relationship
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 02
    My partner and I have been together for nearly 6 years. He has honestly been the most amazing, wonderful and supportive person in my life. He doesn't just make me
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 03
    happier, he makes me healthier. He's been absolutely fantastic in every way imaginable. About 2 years ago, we had the big marriage talk. We
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 04
    were both honest about what we wanted. He admitted that getting married made him so nervous. He has literally never seen a successful marriage. Every marriage
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 05
    he's ever witnessed has either ended in disastrous divorce or very sad premature d❤th. I said I would stay with him whatever he chose but there are some things I wouldn't
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 06
    do unless we were married. Just as he's seen too many marriages fail, I've seen too many loved ones be abandoned by men once the kids come along or when he finds a better option. In
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 07
    other words, as long as we weren't married, no kids and our finances remain strictly untangled from each other. He proposed to me a few months after that and since then, he's turned into an absolute nightmare.
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 08
    First, he refuses to do anything wedding related but accuses me of taking over and being a bridezilla when I make decisions without him. He does things behind my back like inviting
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 09
    our friend who has four kids to bring the children when we agreed the only exception to the no kids rule would be my niece (who will be 3 months old and for obvious
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 10
    reasons can't be separated from my sister for the weekend). I can swallow that frustration but he's also become hyper critical. Any mess around the house, even if he made it, if I
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 11
    haven't cleaned it up by the time he gets home, he refuses to talk to me. I work from home so I usually do a lot of the chores like the dishwasher in my lunch break but sometimes I don't have time.
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 12
    This is a busy time of year and while my job is usually constrained to the 9-5, in the last few weeks I've had to work until 8 or 9. When he stormed in last night angry that he had to clean the
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 13
    kitchen and I pointed out I'd been working for 12 hours straight, he looked me in the eyes and said 'so?' He's threatened to throw me out the house and call off the
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 14
    engagement 4 times. He's stopped initiating so. I've come to dread the sound of the door unlocking because he can't go 5 minutes without finding a problem to have with me.
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 15
    It's so bad that my mother who was ready to adopt him a year ago is refusing to be the witness that signs our marriage certificate.
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 16
    I've asked to call off the wedding, go back to being just girlfriend and boyfriend, but he says he really does want to get married and he's just doing all of this to make
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 17
    sure he's "making the right choice." Increasingly though, all he's done is convince me I'm making the wrong one. Edit to add: If it wasn't clear, I'd already decided not to
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 18
    marry him when I made this post. I'm packing up and going to my mums for now. Im safe and don't need anyone to call the cops. (Thanks to the person who offered though)
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 19
    InfamousCup7097 2 days ago Congratulations, you found out who he REALLY is before marriage. Uncomplicate your life and break up. He is not the wonderful catch you thought he was, and now you have no choice but to remove your rose colored glasses.
    via u/InfamousCup7097
  • 20
    • The_Mikeskies · 2 days ago It's no wonder why he thinks marriages fail. He's modeling the reasons why.
    via u/The_Mikeskies
  • 21
    Face-palmJedi . 2 days ago You aren't obligated to do anything. Despite what anyone one says. Do not marry this man. Leave.
    via u/Face-palmJedi
  • 22
    Comprehensive Put5569. 2 days ago End the relationship. If he's being this much of an AH as a fiancé then he'll be infinitely worse as a husband. You have an opportunity to dodge a bolet - take it!!!!!
    via u/ComprehensivePut5569
  • 23
    Samsquamchadora 2 days ago • You're pretty lucky to learn all this before you get married and have kids. Marriage shouldn't change a thing about a person. I wish you luck making the right decision for you. One thing I will say is
    via u/Samsquamchadora
  • 24
    remember quality over quantity - when he tells you "but we've been together 6 years!" You think about how you've been treated for the last two, you tell him "so?"
    via u/Samsquamchadora
  • 25
    Positive_Pie_8562 OP 2 days ago • Yeah, I'm not marrying him
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 26
    Samsquamchadora 2 days ago Good- I'm glad because you didn't deserve that change up. It's so insulting to have that change up 6 years in. It still hurts, so I hope you have some friends and family to be there for you.
    via u/Samsquamchadora
  • 27
    ExcellentCold7354 · 2 days ago Good for you! For the next time, if you have to convince someone to get married, girl don't do it. If they want you, they'll move mountains to make it happen. This dude was simply dumb enough to let the mask slip before he had you trapped.
    via u/ExcellentCold7354
  • 28
    Positive_Pie_8562 OP. 2 days ago I mean, when we discussed I told him I would be perfectly happy not getting married if he didn't want to. I knew he feels generally disillusioned with marriage. I just simply
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562
  • 29
    wasn't willing to commit to something like kids or a mortgage if he couldn't honestly say he was planning on staying with me for the rest of our lives. Nothing would have happened if he hadn't asked. me.
    via u/Positive_Pie_8562

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